Once upon a time, the common folk in the kingdom faced a summer that could not and would not include family vacations. Not even day trips to visit grandma and grandpa. A collapsed economy had resulted in job loss, higher taxes, inflation, and exploding costs for fuel, groceries, and left families with no extra funds for anything, even an afternoon at the movies.
However, not every single person in the kingdom was affected, particularly the Empress-in-Chief who hadn’t noticed (nor been affected by) the economic downturn. She jetted hither and yon on lavish vacations to Mexico, Vail, Hawaii, Spain, and Ireland (where she lunched with Bono). Good thing the Emperor’s fleet (funded by the common folk) included his-and-hers-luxury jets to accommodate their various travel whims.
Then came the announcement about the vacation “whopper” of the summer. The Emperor and Empress, along with assorted “others,” would travel to Africa. The tab? $100 Million dollars, give or take a few mil.
“Hey” shouted the common folk, “You’re using our money, not your own. Besides, we got needs on the home front! Like taking care of our wounded warriors who are stuck in a world of hurt and waiting years for their promised benefits to kick in. How about resuming White House tours? What the bleep is so important about visiting Africa . . . again?”
The Royal Mouthpiece assured the common folks that the Emperor felt it was vital to make the trip to bolster motivation for the defense of human rights throughout the world. (Interestingly enough, he failed to mention the lack of human rights afforded to the 100,000 men, women, and children who continued to be slaughtered in Syria).
Then it was “leaked” about who and what would travel with the Emperor and Empress as they visited “friendly” African nations. They were to be accompanied by a squad of secret service agents, 56 special vehicles including 14 armored limos, three ginormous trucks loaded with bullet-proof shields to cover their hotel windows, an aircraft carrier with fighter jets to patrol the air space above the entourage, a fully-staffed trauma center, four cousins, three French hens, two turtle doves, and a partridge in a pear tree.
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