Ban Plastic Bags (AKA Get A Life…)


There’s a new social website called Nextdoor, which looks like a different-colored Facebook with a local focus. It’s very new, very earnest, and in its early days utterly lacking in humor, relevance or meaning.

The BIG topic on my town’s Nextdoor is … horror of horrors … plastic bags and the need to ban them. Neighbors are encouraged to show up at a city council meeting to speak out in support of the ban. Unfortunately, I will not be in town. But if I were, I would speak in support of plastic bags and all their wondrous uses. Of course, I am sick to death of people who can’t convince others on the merits of their argument and instead resort to tyranny, but I’ll save that for another day.

On Nextdoor there is one particular member leading the charge. The thread is up to 22 replies, mostly in support of the ban, full of the most mind-numbing and banal statistics about how plastic bags are the scourge of the earth–none of which I have read because, newsflash, I have a life. (It’s not an interesting life, but I’m pretty sure it wouldn’t be any more interesting were I get up to speed about how plastic bags are supposedly ruining the earth.)

On the plastic bag ban thread there is also a link to a documentary movie made about plastic bags called Bagit. Oh, to have a life so full and so empty of challenges that one could devote their artistic energy towards a movie about plastic bags. Whoever you are, I am sure your grandmother is VERY proud. And for your parents’ sake I hope the student loans are paid off and you’re not sleeping on their couch…

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